Tuesday, our History professor was nice enough to pardon us 30 minutes early from class to attend our penal institution-wide free taco party, AND armed robbery, in the cafeteria.
Finally, gun play. Finally, I'm in my element. Finally, I feel at home. You know, for the first time in my reformation, I.just.feel.right. Our institution was sponsoring a Latin American Festival, with free tacos, and salsa lessons with the faculty. Which conceivably, happens in prisons all the time... with a 400 lb. man named Molly, and not Profesor Martinez. I chose not to be anyones dance partner/prison bia***, and darn the luck if I didn't miss out on an armed robbery, as a result of skipping out early. The word on the street is, one thing led to another, and by the end of the enforced fun and shenanigans, two armed gunman equipped with rocketing below average IQ, decided to rob the cafeteria register. Of all the registers to knock over, why a community college cafeteria one? All the students/malefactors use ONEcards or debit cards there, so I'm sure that made off with a stellar $12. Wow, half of a bus ticket out of the pokey. Who knows, maybe we'll have our first murder by mid-terms?
Today, our Psychology professor just about had a meltdown trying to educate the uneducable. You could hear his voice crack a little more with pain, every time he repeated the same statement to her. Flossie, the opened-mouth gum popping bovine, was just not able to comprehend the words coming out of his mouth. Perhaps, it is due to her four stomachs going full throttle trying to process her pork rinds at 8 in the friggin' morning. Little hard to focus.There are dim bulbs, and sometimes there is just no filament at all, and this lite-brite peg better look forward to her career as a port-a-john cleaner.
Mrs. Rodhouse - you literally dodge a bullet - assuming the armament was loaded.
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